


izumi has an intervention

by kennith



Category: Ensemble Stars! (Video Game)
Genre: AFTER 83 YEARS, Anal Fingering, Anal Sex, Anyways, Blow Jobs, Hair-pulling, Hand Jobs, Help this poor boy, M/M, Praise Kink, Rough Sex, Spit As Lube, Unsafe Sex, WEW OK HERE'S THE PORN, he's a cryptid, i treat him like so much shit i'm so sorry, it's 5am and i have school tomorrow what am i doing, izumi has a gun, izumi's a lowkey yandere because i'm a SLUT for yanderes, mika is tired of this stupid bullshit, ok uhhhh, poor mao, rei has a small dick, the first chapter is such a mess but the second chapter is just porn, this is fucking wild, this whole thing is just a shitpost, who knows where leo is
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-10
Updated: 2017-10-23
Packaged: 2019-01-15 15:35:42
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,485
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12323889
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/kennith/pseuds/kennith
Summary: izumi has a problem. mika and co come to help. things don't go as planned.can also be titled as:kill me - mika kagehira ft. rei, koga, and kaoru fucking in the back





	1. mika and mao get shot in the foot

**Author's Note:**

  * For [nozorin](https://archiveofourown.org/users/nozorin/gifts).



> based on a prompt (and some other smaller ideas) from my boyfriend: "the boys have an AAA meeting with izumi to get him to stop threatening anyone who looks at ritsu except he has a gun in his boxers"
> 
> this is such a mess i'm sorry

Mika plopped into the shitty plastic chair and regretted it immediately. It was hard and stiff and hurt his ass. (Much like Arashi’s dick did.) He sighed. “There’s a reason why you’re here, Izumi.”

Izumi scoffed. “And what is that reason? Why did you have to do a fucking _intervention_ with these shitty chairs and cheap fucking cookies?”

They heard a faint crunching noise and saw Rei eating a cookie from the platter on the table. Rei looked up and stopped nibbling on his chocolate chip cookie. “I think the cookies are nice.”

Mika glared at him. Rei slowly put the cookie back on the platter and went back to his seat, whimpering.

Mika groaned and rubbed his face. “We aren’t gonna get anything done…” He folded his hands and looked back at Izumi, his face stern. “Izumi, you can’t just threaten everyone who _looks_ at Ritsu.”   
  
Izumi raised an eyebrow. “So what you’re saying is I can’t be protective of my boyfriend.”   
  
“Okay,” Mika began. He was so fucking done with this bullshit. “For one, he’s not your boyfriend, and two, _you threaten to kill them with a knife_.”

“Citation needed,” Izumi replied.  
  
“ _OH MY FUCKING GOD, IZUMI_ ,” Mika screamed, startling an already scared Mao. Not because Izumi has almost stabbed him twice and he was scared to be near him, no, of course not…

Ritsu jolted out of his sleep. “What the fuck,” he slurred, eyes red. He was high, of fucking course. “What’s going on…”

“Did you sleep well, Kuma-kun?” Izumi asked with a smile, obviously in a better mood.

“Dear fucking God,” Mika mumbled. “I want to fucking die.”

“Everything will be alright, Mika,” Arashi said to him, rubbing his back to calm him down. “We’ll get this figured out.”

Mika loved his boyfriend. If it wasn’t for him he would’ve fucking gutted himself already. “Thank you,” he thanked Arashi with a smile. “Anyways--”  
  
“ _Aaahaaah!_ ” a loud moan came from the shitty broom closet. Everyone turned to it and saw a crudely written sign on the door. “ _CURRENTLY OCCUPIED -- NO GIRLS ALLOWED_ ,” it read.

“Of course,” Mika sighed. Rei, Koga, and Kaoru couldn’t keep their hands off each other for two goddamn seconds. Rei never told anyone he gets double-stuffed to make up for his tiny dick, but everyone knew it already. Mika wished he didn’t.

“Look, Izumi--” he started, before he heard a gunshot. Mao’s high pitched screech filled the small cramped room, and he was on the floor crying, holding his bleeding foot. Izumi’s pants were down and he was holding a pistol, and Ritsu was staring off into space, mumbling stupid shit to himself.

“OH MY GOD WHAT THE _FUCK_ IZUMI,” Mika yelled. “WHERE THE HELL DID YOU GET A GUN?!”

“I keep a gun in my boxers for safety measures,” he clarified.

“OH MY GOD IT HURTS SO BAD,” Mao screamed, tears running down his cheeks.

Arashi quickly dialed 911, tending to Mao’s foot. Mika noticed something white and sticky on the handle of Izumi’s pistol. “Izumi,” he asked, “w-what’s that one the gun?”

Instead of answering, Izumi shot him in the foot as well.

Izumi pulled his pants up and tucked the gun back into his boxers and walked over to Ritsu, happy and smiling. Mika and Mao were on the floor screeching and crying, leaving a stressed and scared Arashi to call an ambulance. Rei, Koga, and Kaoru were still fucking in the closet. They must’ve been really into it if they didn’t hear the gunshot. Or maybe they don’t care. Probably the latter.

Izumi smiled at Ritsu, blushing. “I know you’re really not here right now, Kuma-kun, just let me take you on a date!”

Ritsu smiled back, oblivious to all the things happening at the moment. “Sure, Secchan.”

Izumi pulled Ritsu out of the building, ignoring Arashi’s yelling to stay and help. “So where would you like to go, Kuma-kun?”

“Fuckin’ uhhhhhhhhhhhh…”

Izumi smiled. “Good choice, Kuma-kun!”

He proceeds to take Ritsu to his apartment to fuck.


	2. albino twink gets pounded by sexy vampire vol. 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> izumi and ritsu fuck. that's it that's literally it

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> wow ok uh this is late haha sweats  
> anyways here's the porn you gremlins

You were barely able to get the door shut and locked before Izumi pinned you to the wall. He immediately went for your neck. (You weren’t surprised.) This wasn’t the first time you two have done this, so he knew your sweet spots like the back of his hand. He licked a long stripe on your neck to your Adam’s apple, and you let out a low groan. He smirked ( _you loved that godforsaken smile_ ) and sucked at your sweet spot. You let out a broken moan, going limp against the wall.

“Jackpot, Kuma-kun,” he whispered against your skin, leaving small sucks and nips. He left small peppery kisses after he was done marking you, as if he was kissing an injury like a mother with a child. You moved your head to give him more access to your neck, leaving little moans after every kiss and bite.

You smirked, an idea coming into your head. You lifted your arm (Not like he’d notice, he was too busy pampering your neck) and you groped his crotch. He let out a squeak, startled.

“Cute…” you mumbled.

“Shut up, you asshat,” he said, embarrassed.

“How about I make you instead?” you said, undoing his belt.

“W-wait no--” he stuttered ( _cute…_ ) as you unzipped his fly. You reached into his boxers and he squeaked when you grasped his cock.

“Just relax, Secchan,” you whispered, nibbling on his neck.

“A-ah,” he moaned, “I should be telling you that, fucker.”

You chuckled and began stroking his cock. He let out a broken moan and went limp against your arms. “Let me do the work, Secchan,” you mumbled. You ran your thumb over the head of his cock and began pumping in, shoving your tongue into his mouth to muffle his moans.

He broke away from the kiss, desperate for air. “Fuck, Kuma-kun, _aaahahah_!” He panted and moaned against your mouth, your hand pumping him faster and faster. “Kuma-kun, I’m gonna--” he groaned, breaking away from the kiss. You immediately released his cock, kissing him to muffle his impatient growl.

“Goddammit, why the fuck--”

“I said relax, Secchan,” you said to him, pushing him onto the couch, “let me do the work.”

You grasped his cock again and licked a long stripe up the shaft. He inhaled sharply, the words he was planning to say caught in his throat. You smirked, running your tongue across the head and sinking the top of his cock into his mouth. He let out a broken moan as you began to suck. His cock felt so thick and big in your mouth, and you began drooling as you sunk it in deeper. _Ah, fuck…_ You palmed yourself through your pants, attempting to deepthroat him. You couldn’t get too far without gagging ( _I need to work on that…_ ), but the scream he let out send a warm pleasurable feeling to your belly. He sunk his fingers into your messy hair, pulling and grasping at the dark strands. _Fuck, you loved when he did that…_

His grip was rough and strong, and whenever he pulled too hard to get his cock deeper into your mouth it made you even harder than you were before (if that was even possible…). Your cock was straining against your pants at this point, and you desperately wanted to sink your cock into him, but you had to give him time. Baby steps.

You felt like you could taste his precum, and that only pressured you to go faster and harder. His moans and screams were the only thing you could hear, and it was like the voice of a siren to you.

“O-oh, fuck, ahh, Kuma-kun…” he gasped out between moans. “I’m gonna… ah, shit…”

Using the vice grip he had on your hair, he pulled his cock from out of your mouth and moaned loudly as he came right on your face. You let out a shaky moan as his hot cum covered your already messy face, now covered in spit and cum.

You lifted a shaking hand to your face and got some of his cum on your finger. You licked it off, keeping eye contact with him the entire time. Once your finger was licked clean, you licked the remaining bit off your lips and smirked. “Salty…”

He gulped, his face practically painted red. “Kuma-kun, I-I…” he gasped, desperately trying to pull his pants the rest of the way down. “I need…”

You crawled over him, stroking his cock, and your dick twitched when he let out another desperate moan. “What do you need, Secchan?”

“Don’t make me beg,” he whimpered. You loved that whenever he needed you, his rough, cold personality turned to dust. He was like a lovesick schoolgirl.

You pressed your nose against his, his lips dangerously close to yours. “It’s okay, Secchan, we all need a little help sometimes,” you purred, teasingly rubbing your thumb on the head of his cock.

He growled, and closed his eyes out of embarrassment. “Please fuck me, Kuma-kun,” he asked sweetly. “I-I need your fat cock, I need it so badly, I--”

You pressed a finger against his mouth, silencing him. “That’s all you need to say, Secchan. Don’t worry, I’ll take care of you.”

You pushed him down onto his back, pulling his pants and boxers down in one swift go. You rubbed a finger against his ass, getting a sharp gasp out of him.

“Do you have any lube?” you asked. He shook his head. You shrugged. “I’ll just have to use my spit then. This might hurt a bit, I’m sorry, baby.”

He shuddered at the nickname. “I don’t mind, I want it to hurt a bit…”

You smiled and kissed him. “That’s my boy…”

You lifted two of your fingers up to his mouth. “Suck,” you commanded. You didn’t have to repeat yourself. He took your fingers into his mouth and you almost groaned at the heat. He made sloppy wet noises as he sucked and licked your fingers messily.

When you felt like that was good enough, you pulled your fingers out and kissed his cheek. “Good boy.” He purred at the praise.

You lowered a finger to his ass, running it over his puckered hole. He inhaled sharply at the foreign feeling, and you slowly inserted one into his ass. He sighed, relaxed. You smiled and rubbed your forehead against his to keep him calm and relaxed. You began pumping your finger, enjoying the cute little gasps he let out.

You slowly inserted the second finger so you wouldn’t overwhelm him. He could only take so much. He let out a low moan as your second finger entered him, but he seemed stressed, he face contorted into a slightly pained expression.

“Are you alright, baby? Is it too much?” you asked, worried.

“No, I’m alright,” he lied.

You frowned. Maybe you entered your second finger too quickly. But then you ran one of your fingers against a special spot you immediately recognized as his prostate (You had many encounters with it, how could you not?) and he let out a broken moan.  
  
“Oh fuck, right there…” he gasped.

You smirked. “Your wish is my command.”

You put all of your attention onto that spot, a sense of satisfaction filling you everytime his noises turned into a mix between a loud moan and a scream.

“Oh God, Kuma-kun, I’m gonna cum again--!” he gasped.

You quickly slid your fingers out, ignoring his desperate whine. “Not yet, baby,” you said with a smile, unbuttoning your pants. You slid your cock out of your boxers, throbbing from lack of attention, and lined it up with his ass. “You ready, love?”

He nodded shakily. “Yes…”

You filled his hole with your cock, and you immediately groaned at the heat. _The head is barely in…_ You wanted to fuck him so badly with no mercy, but you needed to let him adjust. He wrapped his arms around your neck and his legs around your waist, essentially trapping you. He pressed his forehead against yours, adjusting to your size.

“Go further, all the way in,” he mumbled.

You obeyed his command, slowly inserting your entire shaft inside him. He let out a shaky groan, and you did your best to hold back yours. This was the first bit of attention your cock got all night, and you loved it. Next time he’s gonna be the one sucking your cock.

“I think I’m ready,” he whispered.

You kissed him, and slowly began thrusting. He moaned into the kiss, and you almost groaned at the feeling of his tight heat against your cock.

You broke the kiss and moaned. “You feel so good, Secchan, so good around my cock,” you whispered into his ear. He shakily moaned at the praise.

“Kuma-kun, harder, don’t be gentle,” he commanded.

You didn’t have to be told twice.

You grasped his hips and slammed into him. He screamed out of pure delight and ecstasy. You obeyed his command and thrusted harder and harder each time, and he was so tight and warm and wet against your cock, you could’ve came right then and there.

He loved it when you were rough with him. He was always sort of a masochist, but that wasn’t really surprising. He was practically sobbing at how good you made him feel, and you were just happy that you could make him feel so well.

“Kuma-kun, I love you so much,” he sobbed.

“I love you too, Secchan,” you said back, kissing him.

He let out a muffled scream against the kiss as he came, his cum splashing between his and your stomachs.

You broke the kiss, desperate for air. “Oh, fuck, God--” you muttered.

You let out a loud groan as you came inside him, your cum overflowing in his ass. You pulled your cock out of him, some of your cum spilling out and onto the couch. You both panted, desperate to catch your breath. You collapsed against him, but you did your best not to crush him.

You hugged him in a vice grip, tired. “Secchaaaaan,” you whined, “can we get some McDonalds now?”

Izumi sighed. “Yes, but let me clean up first. Your cum is staining my couch.”

“I love youuuuu.”

“I love you too, you ass.”

 

* * *

 

Mika sighed. His foot still hurt like hell, even after it was wrapped and cleaned up, and Arashi wasn’t back from the vending machine yet with his goddamn Skittles.

He heard his phone vibrate and did the best he could to reach over and get it. _Success._

It was a new text. He opened it and was greeted to a selfie of Izumi curled up next to a sleeping Ritsu, hickeys covering both of their bodies. Izumi was smiling and giving the camera a peace sign.

 **[vampire fucker]** : he’s mine now bitch

Mika was so done with this fucking bullshit.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> bonus: after ritsu and izumi got mcdonalds they went for round 2 after ritsu dropped his big mac on his dick  
> don't be like ritsu and izumi, practice safe sex kids


End file.
